Re: Preschoolers - October updates
posted at 10/20/2013 3:22 PM EDT
I'd try to be brave and bring this up - as long as the kids aren't around. Could you get together with the parents alone (vs. at a big family event) or go for a walk sans kids during the big family event with just you and the mother and say that you're concerned about their older child, that he seems to understand, but simply his language is delayed? That he seems to want to speak, but can't, which is why you're concerned? And that you think his misbehavior is a result of his lack of language, that he's frustrated, and can't get attention in any other way than being "the bad one."?
That being said, I kept my mouth shut around my cousin with her 1st child, whom I thought had some delays but given they had ZERO respect for "day care" (said in a super TONE), my being a "day care" teacher wouldn't have cut the mustard. Figured some day they'd get information from his snazzy preschool teachers (who, as far as I could tell, weren't any different from me, especially after I had them in workshops I was teaching, ahem), but they never said anything, so finally in 1st grade they heard from "real" teachers that there were issues. And, indeed, there were generalized LDs that he struggled with throughout school. I didn't see their family enough to be able to really say anything other than "I have concerns, I see red flags" and I thought it wouldn't work for me to say anything given the family dynamics, and the fact that they didn't think much of my career, my knowledge, my anything.
Soooooo.... I was a wuss, I wouldn't think less of you for not saying anything! those who live in glass houses for sure don't throw stones!
Now that I have more experience and am older, I'd say something, but back then, I didn't.