sorry - need to vent
-
sorry - need to vent
posted at 5/24/2011 1:57 PM EDT
- mrsrcs
- Posts: 26
- First: 10/3/2007
- Last: 5/25/2011
Hi - I know this has been covered before, but will people never learn that it is not nice to comment on how big an expectant woman looks?? I am six weeks away from a scheduled delivery and today have been asked twice if I am sure that I am not having twins and have had someone else comment on how "pregnant" I look.. -
Re: sorry - need to vent
posted at 5/24/2011 3:11 PM EDT
- Daisy75
- Posts: 919
- First: 6/4/2008
- Last: 1/22/2013
A wise woman once said "you should never ask a woman if she's pregnant until the baby is crowning." I think the spirit of that should extend to commenting on a woman's size during her pregnancy. -
Re: sorry - need to vent
posted at 5/24/2011 3:23 PM EDT
- Trouble30
- Posts: 810
- First: 7/17/2009
- Last: 5/21/2013
And please don't tell a woman she looks pregnant in her face, butt, etc. Or that she doesn't. It's weird and creepy either way. -
Re: sorry - need to vent
posted at 5/24/2011 3:57 PM EDT
- GC1016
- Posts: 905
- First: 5/30/2008
- Last: 1/16/2013
I once had a colleague round the corner and say, "WHOA! You shouldn't stand sideways."
His loose grasp on perspective aside: really???? And I didn't really pop until month seven or eight.
The benefit is that if you snap back, "Shut up or I'll eat you," the rude person can't really say much about it. -
Re: sorry - need to vent
posted at 5/24/2011 4:02 PM EDT
- mrsrcs
- Posts: 26
- First: 10/3/2007
- Last: 5/25/2011
GC- that is the perfect thing to say! Thanks for the laugh and the support from the other posters too.. I needed it today!
I have been tempted to respond back.. "and how about you, rough night last night? you look a bit hung over" or something along those lines.. but have held it back. -
Re: sorry - need to vent
posted at 5/24/2011 4:19 PM EDT
- misslily
- Posts: 2413
- First: 11/9/2006
- Last: 5/17/2013
Here's another one. "I'm pregnant...what's your excuse?" Gets 'em every time.
Daisy and I both were carrying twins. I don't know about her, but I was huge with babies at the end (37 weeks). I had to buy a stool so I could sit down in the shower. Standing that long tired me out!
Good luck! -
Re: sorry - need to vent
posted at 5/24/2011 4:29 PM EDT
- beniceboston
- Posts: 1177
- First: 12/12/2007
- Last: 10/2/2012
Since we don't know the sex of the baby, my husband had someone he knows through work, who figured he could tell, ask him if my butt got really big... if so, then it was a girl, I think?
I also had a co-worker (a male) , whom I detest with all my heart & soul, ask my husband if I was breast-feeding... I was really grossed out to have him reference my breasts...ughhhhhh. -
Re: sorry - need to vent
posted at 5/24/2011 4:31 PM EDT
- Daisy75
- Posts: 919
- First: 6/4/2008
- Last: 1/22/2013
Lily--When we moved into our house, I was 32 weeks. The "big bathroom" has a tub/shower combo, but the shower head was all jammed up with YEARS of hard water, etc. deposits on it so the water only came out in a trickle. The "little bathroom" has a shower stall, and the shower head was decent. With everything else we had to do, it took a few days to replace the shower head in the big bathroom, so I had to use the shower stall in the meantime. It was a tight fit and I could barely turn around in there.
I was still standing at the end, but barely. I would have been afraid to sit in the shower--even on a stool--for fear that I wouldn't be able to stand back up to get out. :)
And even when I was 37 weeks (delivered at 37.5), I had random people comment on how huge I was and others saying how "tiny" I was and didn't believe I could be carrying twins. Bottom line--people have no idea what they're talking about. -
Re: sorry - need to vent
posted at 5/24/2011 5:15 PM EDT
- Notanewbie
- Posts: 361
- First: 8/4/2008
- Last: 7/13/2011
Random weird comments don't stop when you have the baby either...I remember a stranger in the supermarket that I ran into once. I was wearing my DS in a close-fitting wrap. This older man leaned in towards me and made a standard comment like, "Oh how cute. Boy or girl? How old?", kind of regular, non-crazy questions. Then he popped out with, "Are you breastfeeding?" While staring down into my cleavage! I kind of stammared a smart-a$$ response something like, "Huh? Am I supposed to be feeding him?'' And kind of ran out of the store from there. I was totally and unexpectedly creeped out. -
Re: sorry - need to vent
posted at 5/24/2011 5:25 PM EDT
- kargiver
- Posts: 21663
- First: 10/17/2005
- Last: 5/20/2013
Ewwwww, ladies, men asking you (or DH, benice) about bf'ing is so creepy. -
Re: sorry - need to vent
posted at 5/25/2011 9:42 AM EDT
- Prill
- Posts: 750
- First: 6/26/2008
- Last: 8/9/2012
I have had the biggest creep in our office comment on my weight, before talking at me, in detail, about his wifes labor and how she was in agony for 23 hours. It was when he used the term 'dilated' that I got toally grossed out.
Why do people think that just because you're pregnant, you suddenly have this weird bond to other parents and want to know TMI about them (or their partner).
Misslily - I do like the "what's your excuse?" comeback, must remember that one! -
Re: sorry - need to vent
posted at 5/25/2011 9:49 AM EDT
- mrsrcs
- Posts: 26
- First: 10/3/2007
- Last: 5/25/2011
I don't get why people feel it's ok to ask the BF'ing question either.. My husband's clients are already asking him if I plan on bf'ing this baby and even more invasive, if we plan on having another after this one or if I will have the doctor take care of "things"
while having this baby.. um.. can we settle into have a 3 yr old and infant before we decide on any future offspring? people are crazy! -
Re: sorry - need to vent
posted at 5/25/2011 10:36 AM EDT
- RedFishBlueFish
- Posts: 275
- First: 7/13/2010
- Last: 10/16/2012
Maybe the men are thinking of their own future plans:
http://www.slate.com/id/2295405/
(The timeliness of that article begged for it not to be ignored.) -
Re: sorry - need to vent
posted at 5/25/2011 11:55 AM EDT
- purplecow89
- Posts: 279
- First: 1/30/2009
- Last: 5/20/2013
How about, "Pregnancy is temporary, stupidity is permanent"?
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Re: sorry - need to vent
posted at 5/25/2011 12:09 PM EDT
- kargiver
- Posts: 21663
- First: 10/17/2005
- Last: 5/20/2013
Or, "I'll lose my belly when the baby is born...what is your plan?" -
Re: sorry - need to vent
posted at 5/25/2011 12:49 PM EDT
- capecod1818
- Posts: 115
- First: 7/15/2008
- Last: 8/6/2012
Ha I love these come backs. When I was pregnant with my DS the receptionist at my gym would ALWAYS comment on how big I was. It got to the point that I didn't want to go and work out as she would make me feel bad the moment I got in the building. She wasn't trying to be mean but I am not looking forwad to the comments coming my way once I start showing again with baby #2. I will have some ammo now with these come backs. -
Re: sorry - need to vent
posted at 5/25/2011 12:55 PM EDT
- purplecow89
- Posts: 279
- First: 1/30/2009
- Last: 5/20/2013
Or, "Better a baby in my belly than a foot in my mouth!" -
Re: sorry - need to vent
posted at 5/25/2011 12:56 PM EDT
- lemonmelon
- Posts: 2236
- First: 7/31/2006
- Last: 2/22/2012
In Response to Re: sorry - need to vent:Ha I love these come backs. When I was pregnant with my DS the receptionist at my gym would ALWAYS comment on how big I was. It got to the point that I didn't want to go and work out as she would make me feel bad the moment I got in the building. She wasn't trying to be mean but I am not looking forwad to the comments coming my way once I start showing again with baby #2. I will have some ammo now with these come backs.
Posted by capecod1818
In this particular situation, I'd say something to her supervisor. It's not appropriate and she's probably doing it to others as well. -
Re: sorry - need to vent
posted at 5/25/2011 12:59 PM EDT
- kargiver
- Posts: 21663
- First: 10/17/2005
- Last: 5/20/2013
In Response to Re: sorry - need to vent:Or, "Better a baby in my belly than a foot in my mouth!"
Posted by purplecow89That's a good one, but do you think those morons would get it? I think it might just get a "Huh?" LOL!! -
Re: sorry - need to vent
posted at 5/25/2011 12:59 PM EDT
- Prill
- Posts: 750
- First: 6/26/2008
- Last: 8/9/2012
And lets not get me started on people touching me. Friends, family, sure, no problem.... people in the office that I hardly know, please step away from me! -
Re: sorry - need to vent
posted at 5/25/2011 1:00 PM EDT
- kargiver
- Posts: 21663
- First: 10/17/2005
- Last: 5/20/2013
Oh, and I agree with lemon - a gym employee should NEVER comment on ANYONE'S size just per the nature of their job if not out of respect for fellow human beings. -
Re: sorry - need to vent
posted at 5/25/2011 1:17 PM EDT
- Trouble30
- Posts: 810
- First: 7/17/2009
- Last: 5/21/2013
So I just got off the elevator at my job. The other woman who was on it goes to me, "wow, you must be ready to pop."
So I told her I have 2 more months. Then she goes, "Are you carrying twins?"
Ugh.. I think she realized she stuck her foot in her mouth in the end, but the damage was already done. -
Re: sorry - need to vent
posted at 5/25/2011 1:24 PM EDT
- kargiver
- Posts: 21663
- First: 10/17/2005
- Last: 5/20/2013
You could say, "No, I'm not carrying twins. Actually, I hope to be published in the National Inquirer after the birth." -
Re: sorry - need to vent
posted at 5/25/2011 1:25 PM EDT
- lissafro
- Posts: 851
- First: 4/15/2007
- Last: 5/20/2013
When I was pregnant if people touched my belly I would reach out and rub theirs. Once I even squeeze/pinched an inch. The trick is to do it with a completely benign smile, as if it's a perfectly normal thing to do. The squeeze comes if they don't back off instinctively from being touched. -
Re: sorry - need to vent
posted at 5/25/2011 1:44 PM EDT
- mrsrcs
- Posts: 26
- First: 10/3/2007
- Last: 5/25/2011
Liss- what a great idea! I am sitting here laughing thinking of the reactions that you must have gotten! good for you!!