posted at 1/4/2010 10:46 AM EST
posted at 1/4/2010 10:57 AM EST
flaxen, I don't have any experience with an ep or methotrexate, but wanted to say I'm so sorry to hear you're having to go through this. Big hugs to you and I hope you and DH are coping okay with all of the twists and turns you've had to go through.
posted at 1/4/2010 11:15 AM EST
I am so sorry you are going through this. I had an ectopic pregnancy a few years ago which was treated with Methotrexate. I didn't experience any side effects from the Methotrexate, nor from the Ectopic pregnancy itself. We were told to wait a couple of months before TTC again after the Ectopic, but since that pregnancy was a bit of a surprise, we decided to wait longer to TTC again. For what it's worth, I got pregnant again with DD soon after we started trying. I had a couple of very early ultrasounds while pregnant with DD, just to rule out another ectopic, but other than that, my pregnancy was completely unremarkable. I hadn't undergone any fertility treatments, though, so I'm not sure how that might change the picture at all. Again, I'm so sorry you are going through this. If you have any specific questions, feel free to ask, and I'll do my best to answer them.
posted at 1/4/2010 11:57 AM EST
Oh my goodness flaxen... I did not expect to read this from you today. I am so sorry to hear what you and your DH are going through. Talk about a tough couple of months with TTC... You've really been through the ringer. I hear you on losing steam with TTC, it's totally understandable with all you've been going through.
Good luck with the Methotrexate and I hope there are no side effects. Unfortunately I have no advice to give to you on it b/c I have not been through an EP myself.
Wishing you and your DH the best.
posted at 1/4/2010 3:33 PM EST
posted at 1/5/2010 3:24 PM EST
posted at 1/5/2010 8:32 PM EST
Flax - I just cannot believe what you have had to go through! Oh the horrible ups and downs you have experienced. I am really sorry to hear you are going through all this. My cousin-in-law just went through the same thing, did very well and is back to TTC I believe 2 months later.
I am so sorry my dear.
posted at 1/5/2010 8:57 PM EST
I am going through the SAME thing! What I thought was a chemical pregnancy is also most likely an EP...bloodwork and ultrasound tomorrow. my HCG is at 245 and I have been spotting since Christmas Eve. If ultrasound tomorrow shows ep I will most likely have this shot - never heard of it before and don't know anything about it - how was it for you? I need a buddy to go through this with! I am so nervous, confused and...just at a loss! I truly thought this was a chemical pregnancy and dealt with everything a few weeks ago (hence the absence from the boards!) now, I get a call from my doctor saying I'm pregnant but it's not a good thing! Sooooooooooooooo frustrated and maxed out! please let me know how you're doing!
posted at 1/6/2010 8:25 AM EST
posted at 1/6/2010 10:44 AM EST
I don't have any experience with Methotrexate, but I wanted to let you know that I understand how you feel, but don't give up! I had a molar pregnancy, which resulted in having weekly, then monthly blood tests, and not being allowed to try again for an entire year. It was very scary and stressful, and during that time I tried to convince myself that maybe life would be better if I didn't have a child. I was afraid I wouldn't get pregnant, or that it would happen again. Well, we waited that year and nervously tried again. I was convinced that it would be a disaster, but my boys are now 9 and 7, and I am so thankful I gave it another shot. Hang in there, and hopefully a few years from now you can have a similar story and this event won't seem nearly as horrific as it does at the moment!
posted at 1/6/2010 4:51 PM EST
posted at 1/6/2010 4:53 PM EST
thank you so much flax and michelle!
michelle - i do hope that eventually i will have a story to tell my kids about how much they were a pain in the arrse to have but it makes me love them all the more!
speaking of pains in the arrse...just had my shots and I am now back home...
flax, thank you so much for your long post!!!!!! it is so helpful to know that i am not in this alone. I have actually had you in my mind a lot these past couple of days, knowing that if flax can do it so can i! ;)
my levels were in the mid 300s today and after an ultrasound and some bloodwork they determined that an ectopic was the most likely scenario. my hubby held my hand while i got two shots in the bum - one in each cheek - how nice of them to not make one feel left out! i cried but not because of pain, just because i am so stinkin sick of being pricked! i completely relate to your fatigue comment because i also feel worn out - i know it's too early to blame it on the metho shot so i think i can safely say that i am just plain ol' bummed out! i can honestly say that i am not sad about not being able to try for a couple of months - we decided that we would do that three weeks ago when i thought i had experienced the chemical pregnancy...now, I am just in the what if stage where i am "borrowing trouble" (as my dad would call it) and thinking about all of the what ifs...what if i have another ectopic, what if there is permanent damage, what if it ruptures...the list goes on and on! anyway, i am sure that time will calm these nerves. i go in for more bloodwork on saturday morning and hopefully the levels will have gone down...but thank you for the heads up that they might go up.
god, can't a girl have a glass of wine after all of this!? sheeesh...i just want my life back!
thanks for listening and thanks for being there! flax, i am SO glad to hear that your treatment is headed down the right path!!!!! stay strong.
i will keep you posted.
posted at 1/13/2010 7:44 PM EST
posted at 1/15/2010 10:24 AM EST
I have been thinking about you as well...wondering how everything is going. We actually got some really terrible news on Tuesday that my levels had gone up (after the methotrexate shot). I was told that I would have to come back for more bw and us and possible be rushed into surgery. I cried and cried that night, but pulled myself together and back to the RSC we went...only to find out that my levels went down to 560 (from 620). So, I have to wait until tomorrow (saturday) for more bloodwork. If my levels plateau or stay around where they are then they will have to give me a second shot and if they show a 15% drop then they will just keep testing me until my levels (hopefully) go down to 0. I am very nervous for tomorrow and can only hope and pray that the medicine is doing its thing. I don't know about you, but I got sick as a DOG after my shot. I got the most terrible cold and could barely swallow because my throat hurt so badly. It really took me down...it's been a tough past couple of weeks, to say the least. I hope your treatment was better than mine!
Yes, we will be in the waiting game as well - if I have to get another shot, we will have to wait up to six months. The ironic part of all of this is that that's what we decided after dealing with the "chemical pregnancy" - we were going to wait until march or so because our jobs are so crazy right now...maybe this was just my guardian angel's way of making sure that we actually kept our word and DID wait!
I have also been considering the mind and body thing - at MGH, right? It was recommended to me by a friend. Do you have any information on it? Cost?
this whole experience has been particularly difficult because I don't know anyone who has ever had this happen to them - so it's just been very mysterious and scary...you are the only one who I have found to know exactly what i'm talking about! it's been very helpful.
Hope you are well.
posted at 1/15/2010 10:49 AM EST
cookies and flaxen - you are both in my thoughts. I hope you both have 0 levels soon and can move past this. Let us know if you do the support group and how it is. I'll bet it would be a great help. So sorry you're both being put throught the ringer like this...
posted at 1/15/2010 11:50 AM EST
Cookies- What an ordeal you are going through... Keeping my fingers crossed for you that you get good news today. I really hope your levels come down tomorrow, best of luck.
Flax- Are you still seeing Dr. Lee? She is an amazing and supportive doctor and I know without a doubt that if she didn't think it was possible for you to get a BFP, she'd tell you! That's one thing I've always loved about Dr. Lee, she's very upfront, whether you want to hear it or not. So you are in good hands my dear! :-)
posted at 1/15/2010 12:19 PM EST
posted at 1/16/2010 1:01 PM EST
just got the call from the doctor and my levels went down to 490 (from 560). this is very good news as i will not need a second methotrex shot just yet...more bloodwork next friday. I am having a hard time being excited. the levels are still so high and I just can't imagine how long it will take or how they could possibly get down to zero from this point. this is such a waiting game!
not sure about the protocol on this, but flax would you like to get a cup of coffee (or tea, or ginger drink!) some time to comiserate?
rhm and blushing - it means a lot to hear your words of encouragement! I really appreciate the time you take to check in - so thoughtful! hope you are both well.
posted at 1/16/2010 5:19 PM EST
Cookies - that is good news that your levels are going down. I hope that this will be done for you soon!
Flax - I feel that even though you have sufferred so much through these two that you definitely still have hope and I am glad your doctor said so as well.
Blush - good to see you on the boards. How are you doing?
I will go for embryo transfer in about 1 1/2 weeks. I am dreading the 2ww again. I mean, after 15 of these you would think it would get easier. I am really bummed b/c my doctor said that boston IVF does not do a lot of blastocyst transfers. I got an opinion from someone I know at MGH and he felt that we should go with what BIVF is most comfortable with. So...that being said, we are going to do a regular embryo transfer. I am not sure what we are going to do if this doesn't work. I don't know if we can transfer frozen embryos elsewhere.
I just don't know.... I hope it doesn't come for that but I really have such little hope at this point even though we have a lot of embryos. So, we wait....
RHM - I hope you are feeling well! You must be getting so excited!
posted at 1/17/2010 8:49 AM EST
cookies - glad to hear your numbers are starting to go down. I hope they continue at your next b/w checkup.
lil - will be sending good vibes your way for the next ET. What is the difference between a blastocyst transfer and a regular embryo transfer? I barely made it to a regular ET both times we tried so I'm not sure. I'm still doing fairly well. 7 weeks left - can't believe it! Took an infant CPR class yesterday and next week we have the childbirth class. Feeling pretty good - you won't hear any complaining from me.
posted at 1/17/2010 12:52 PM EST
posted at 1/17/2010 9:18 PM EST
Cookies- Congrats on your levels continuing to come down, that's great! I hope they come down further so you can avoid getting that second shot.
Flax- Hope you are doing well... Have you decided to take the mind/body class? If you decide to take it, I'm interested to hear how the class is.
RHM- Congrats on only having 7 weeks to go! These 7 months have gone SO fast. Best of luck in taking your childbirth classes.
LIL- So great to see you on the boards too! I know this has been quite an ordeal for you, so I can understand you being bummed with this. You are a very strong person with what you've been through already and it's great seeing that your husband has been there with you every step of the way. I have a question... In your post were you asking if you can transfer your frozen embryo's to someone else? Just want to make sure that this is what you were asking. My DH have 1 emby that's frozen and whenever we get the bill for storage, it includes other options if we'd like them. One of the options is donating the frozen emby if we decide we don't want to continue with TTC. DH and I have actually spoke about this b/c there was a time when we didn't know what was going to happen with TTC. If it came to that, I think we would donate our frozen emby, but things look more optimistic for us now.
AFM- Things got really crazy with the holidays and moving into our house in Nov and Dec, so we took time off from TTC. We're getting ready to start up again now though. I'm going back to my specialist on Tues for a follow up and then we'll go from there.
posted at 1/18/2010 9:43 AM EST
Flax - The prep for a frozen transfer is ridiculously easy compared to all other cycles. Just a little estrogen pill + estrogen patch and you are good to go! I hope you are feeling well. Thanks for your positive thoughts about the 3dt You are right. I sometimes go into cycles thinking, ok, well what are we doing different that is going to make this successful.
Blush - So good to hear from you too! We are using donor embryos. We have 19. Oh wait, now I realize what you are asking. No, I don't want to give them to someone else (which in our donor agreement we can) but I meant can I take them to a different facility to do a blastocyst transfer. The perk to Boston IVF is they pay for the storage for one year which is pretty cool so I have never gotten that bill.
Cookies - I hope you are hanging in there!
Off to snow blow! May 2010 be our year ladies (don't look back in the posts because I think I said that about 2009 too. :) )
posted at 1/18/2010 11:04 AM EST
LIL- I am SO sorry I misunderstood what you were asking in your other post. I totally understand now that you've explained it! Not sure if you can take your emby's to a different facility... Anyone else know? Harvard Pilgrim also paid for my storage the first year which was very convenient.
posted at 1/20/2010 1:50 PM EST
got bloodwork today, per Flax's recommendation (thank you for that!)... levels are down to 412. Friday I will go back in and hopefully see another decline. I am down from 490 on Saturday the 16th (a 15% drop, which I hear from the nurse is exactly what they're looking for...I feel anything more than that would be a pure miracle). what a loooooong process this is - at this rate, I don't expect my levels to go down to zero for at least another month...is this normal?
good luck to lil and blush!!!!!!!!!!
I just heard something from a friend that has really piqued my interest...apparently a sensitivity to gluten can cause infertility. I have read quite a few stories of women trying a gluten free diet and then getting pregnant one to two months later. I am considering going down this route - I don't think it could hurt and my long history of abdominal pain/gas (sorry, tmi) might have been trying to tell me something! Has anyone heard of this?
We are switching doctors in March - going to see Dr. Toth at MGH...I can't remember who recommended him, but we're going to give him a shot! We won't be ready to start back up again by march but at least we can get started with the introductions and more tests, if need be.
re, meeting up for a cup of coffee...i don't want to push the issue, but if anyone is interested (flax, you said you're up for it!?), I would love to meet up...but I am not sure how to arrange this...i am somewhat new to these boards so I am not sure if this is something that's already been covered, or if its even a sore subject for those trying to maintain their anonymity...I just figured it wouldn't hurt to ask!