Unlike our beloved Patriots, The New England Bear did not choke, literally or figuratively.

 

Wing Bowl 21 shocker: The New England Bear wins

 

WIP

WIP's Wing Bowl 21 at the Wells Fargo Center on Feb. 1, 2013. ( Alejandro Alvarez / Staff Photographer )

 

n a shocker, an out-of-towner nicknamed "The Bear" has won Wing Bowl XXI, and $20,000, by consuming 287 wings in just a half-hour.

The total was second-most in Wing Bowl history, surpassed only by last year's professional winner, Takeru Kobayashi, who did not defend his title.

 

Falling five wings short was three-time champ Jonathan "Super" Squib of South Jersey, the lone local representative in the top-tier matchup of top eaters from six cities. His total of 282 wings  actually his Wing Bowl best. It just wasn't good enough.

 

One consolation: The Dallas entry, wearing a Tony Romo jersey, puked early on and had to be disqualified. "If you heave, you leave," as the event's rule of tum declares. Jordan "Baby Face" Avalos, who weighs only 155 pounds, also ran away in panic midway through his entourage tour around the arena floor. Might have had something to do with being pelted by various objects.

 

It was a wild Wing Bowl (as usual), highlighted by the enthusiastically cheered appearance of Eagles coach Chip Kelly, who had little to say beyond, "Wow. Wow," and something about how as great as Wing Bowl is, the celebration of an Eagles Super Bowl win might be 1,000 times as mind-blowing.

 

The biggest area winner was Dave "U.S. Male" Goldstein, of Voorhees, who won a new Nissan Pathfinder for eating 266 wings, most in the all-local portion of the competition. Earlier, he also won 12 trips to a resort in Punta Cana, the Dominican Republic, for putting on the best show during the opening parade of eaters' entourages. 

 

His "Bynumland" float, complete with bowling pins, spoofed sidelined Sixer center Andrew Bynum, who said he injured a knee while rolling a few frames. Goldstein grabbed his own knee, and collapsed in mock-agony.

 

James "The Bear" McDonald of Granby, Conn., who ate five dozen Krispy Kreme doughnuts in 9 minutes as his pre-Wing Bowl stunt, was trailing Goldstein (148 wings) and Squib (138) after the first 14-minute round. But McDonald picked up the pace to take the lead after Round 2 with 265, solidly surprassing Squib's 253 and the 247 for U.S. Male. Two Philly guys also made the  Top 5: Brendan "Skin & Bones" Lyman, with 202, and David "Tiger Wings & Things" Brunelli, with 220.