OT--a bit of levity for the bye week
posted at 11/6/2013 6:46 PM EST
Those of you who read this site regularly know that I'm a New Englander transplanted to Toronto. Well, yesterday, it finally happened. Our illustrious Mayor finally came out and admited that the video of him smoking crack (while he was in office, no less, though not actually while physcially in his office but rather while he was taking a break from his mayoral duties to visit a local crack house) is indeed real:
Here's what he said in a press conference yesterday:
"Yes, I have smoked crack cocaine," Ford said.
"But, no — do I? Am I an addict? No. Have I tried it? Um, probably in one of my drunken stupors, probably approximately about a year ago."
Okay . . . I'm wondering how this helps him. It's bad enough he smokes crack while in office, but now he admits to doing it in "one of my drunken stupors." Not "in a drunken stupor," mind you, but in one of his drunken stupors. This begs two questions: exactly how often is our mayor going about in a drunken stupor? Once a week, twice a week, every day after noon (and it's always after noon somewhere, isn't it)? And if he's going about in drunken stupors with even a fair bit of regulatity, what else has he done while in them? Of course there's a dark (and not very funny) side to this story, since the two drug dealers he was filmed smoking with have both been shot since the story originally broke, and one of them killed. This does raise the rather uncomforting possibility that the mayor had one of his "friends" (many of whom it is turning out are convicted criminals) try to retrieve that video a bit too aggressively. In fact, his "driver" is now being charged with extortion apparently for his attempts to get hold of the video before the police or press got hold of it. This driver has already been convicted of wife beating and a few other unpleasantries, but Mayor Ford still found it apt to write a glowing character reference for him.
To cap it all off, after his notorious press conference, he said this:
[I am] "ashamed" [but feel like] "1,000 pounds have been lifted off my shoulders." It's hard to tell whether this is a truthful statement, as anyone who has seen pictures of Mayor Ford and his more than ample girth knows that 1,000 pounds plus or minus wouldn't make all that much difference in his appearance.
Anyway, this does have something to do with football after all, as this video from a year ago shows. I think it was filmed just before Ford was forced to give up his coaching duties at a local high school for having used city resources to do fundraising for the school team. Anyway, for those who think Brady's footwork has been poor, please watch this:
I have to admit, I'll kind of miss the good mayor when he's gone. He makes politics a whole boatload of fun up here.