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In St. Lucia, a different kind of spa caters to interests of both halves of a twosome

Author: By Julie Hatfield and Timothy Leland, Globe Staff

Date: SUNDAY, September 21, 1997

Page: M1

Section: Travel

He wanted to play golf.

She wanted to eat light.

He wanted to eat well.

And he wanted a cocktail before dinner, wine with dinner, and chocolate after dinner.

She wanted to do what women usually do with other women at a health spa, but this time she wanted her husband along.

He didn't want to go to a spa.

They were at a vacation impasse. What to do?

She found the solution. It was a new kind of spa for couples -- ``Le Sport'' in St. Lucia -- which offered free golf, free therapeutic massages, as many free drinks, day and night, as the liver can take, and good non-spa food.

``Pack your bags,'' he said, ``we're on our way.''

So off we went, to a sublime if totally self-indulgent five-day vacation at a ``health spa'' in St. Lucia. ``Health spa'' has to be put in quotes, because it certainly was like no other health spa we'd heard of.

You have to understand that the husband in this twosome is the skinniest man in the Northeast. Someone who can barely be seen if he stands sideways. Someone whose friends always greet him by saying, ``Tim, you've lost weight!'' He is the last man in the Northern Hemisphere to need to go to a spa, and until January 1997, the last man to want to go to a spa.

``Why should I pay money to have them starve me to death?'' was this man's cry -- until his wife showed him pictures of barbecued steaks, baked potatoes, chocolate cake and ice cream, all available at this spa if you prefer it.

What really turned this Yankee penny pincher around, though, was the thought of free drinks, free golf, and free massages -- ``free'' meaning that it is all part of the prepaid package.

We had recently returned from a family vacation at a Club Med in Oaxaca, Mexico, and we love the prepaid exuberance of a CM vacation where (almost) everything is paid for in advance. But at Club Med, we had to pay extra for our greens fees at the adjacent golf course. Not at Le Sport. The golf was free. So was the taxi that took us on the three-minute drive to the first tee.

And at Club Med, one buys beads to pay for the pretty drinks before lunch or dinner. Not at Le Sport, where you can sidle up to the bar at any time of the day or night and order the most exotic ``Tropical Cocktails'' -- all on the house.

The drinks come in the most amazing variety of concoctions. There are the usual pink cocktails, banana daiquiris, and pina coladas, of course. But in addition are drinks with names such as ``Lucien Hammer'' (made with orange juice, pineapple juice, bitters, and a St. Lucia ginger liquor known as ``Seventh Heaven''), ``Ginger Punch'' (with dark rum, assorted fruit juices, and grenadine syrup), ``Lucien Bull Low,'' ``Bliss Cooler,'' ``Kako,'' ``Crystal Express,'' ``Sophisticated Lady,'' and the like.

To make matters even more decadent, you don't even have to move your body over to the bar to get these drinks. Beginning at 10 a.m., as we lay on the beautiful, unspoiled beach in front of our room, smiling waiters would regularly come over to ask us if we'd like something to drink. We'd usually hold ourselves in check . . . at least until 11:30.

Some spa, you say.

Well, the idea of this one is that you are in control of your body's needs and ultimate looks. You decide what's best for it. We heard there were two visitors to the spa the first year who finished a bottle of Johnny Walker shortly after their arrival. They continued to drink with fervor (without misbehaving) throughout their stay and have returned every year since. The spa staff says that drinkers such as these balance out with those visitors to the spa who are nondrinkers, so Le Sport doesn't end up in the red.

Lavish buffets are offered for breakfasts and lunches, but most of the dinners are sit-down affairs with a menu and waiters. More than half of the items on the menu at dinnertime are ``cuisine legere,'' light cooking without much butter or creamy sauces.

Always, there are choices available on the buffet table that provide substitutions for the caloric food that causes weight gain. But Neal Wager, the 25-year-old executive sous chef, said that will power seems to be a struggle with most guests. ``If we put some rolled oats and yogurt desserts out along with some chocolate cake,'' he said, ``it's amazing how fast the chocolate cake goes.''

Asked how he stayed so trim, he answered, ``I don't eat my food.''

According to Neal, who studied and worked in England, France, Germany, and the United States (at the Breakers in Palm Beach, Fla.), Le Sport is going to put the complete caloric count on the menu soon. As of now, however, each guest is on his/her own, free to pick and choose, although the staff will walk anyone around the buffet table and help them with a low-calorie meal, if they wish. ``We can handle any sort of food problems or special needs,'' says Neal. `` To give you an example, we recently had a vegan here (someone who won't eat meat, fish, or dairy products) who was also allergic to mushrooms, and we figured out a menu for him.''

Of course, if you have a rich dessert at dinner, you can always dance it off right there in the restaurant. Live bands, featuring a different style of music each night, play for dancing in the open-air restaurant during dinner.

St. Lucia's beauty is part of this spa's ``cure,'' as it were.

When we arrived from the cold gray north and threw open the windows of our balcony to a vista of lush green pitons (the volcanic mountains that make up the island), palm trees, and the Lucian salt-and-pepper volcanic sand beach overlooking the turquoise West Indian Ocean, it was like going from a black and white into a Technicolor movie. The weather is about 84 degrees by day, 78 by night -- in other words, pure bliss.

And speaking of bliss, there are also the treatments.

On your first day of at the spa, after checking into your room (where hibiscus blossoms sit atop the white kimono robes on the bed), one of the beautiful Lucian staff members explains how to walk the 89 steps up the green mountainside to the health center to meet the nurse and receive your computerized ``treatment'' schedule.

Each guest at Le Sport is entitled to two free treatments per day. They come in many forms: body massages, algae bubble baths, foot massages, hair and scalp treatments, seaweed wraps, and facial massages. The slogan at Le Sport is ``Give us your body for a week and we'll give you back your mind.'' We arrived on a Monday, and by Wednesday, we were racing to complete the entire relaxation schedule by the end of the five-day package, and still get a swim in before dinner.

Julie ticked off Tim's program for the afternoon:

``At 1 p.m. you have a seaweed wrap.

``At 2:30, you've got a facial massage.

``At 3 p.m. you have a tennis lesson with the pro, and as soon as you get through that, at 4 o'clock you have to take a shower and get up to the Oasis for your algae bath. After that, I'll try to find out what's involved in the stress reduction class, which starts at 6 o'clock. If we don't like the sound of it, we'll take our own stress reduction option and go get a free drink.''

There is very little stress of any kind at Le Sport, and the treatments have a lot to do with that.

Although somewhat tentative at first, Tim became as enchanted with the treatments. On the first day, he went bravely off to have his first reflexology treatment. The next day, he had his first foot massage. And the day after that, a facial. He thoroughly enjoyed the algae bath, the aromatherapy, and the body massage, the towels discreetly placed while the St. Lucian woman with the lovely, soft, Creole-accented English voice worked on his muscles.

On the fourth day, however, when he arrived for his ``jet shower massage'' -- wearing his bathing suit and white robe -- he was in for a shock.

``Take off everything, turn your back to me and stand in that stall with your hands against the walls,'' ordered the woman wielding the giant jet hose. Sheepishly, he complied, and when she turned on the jets, hundreds of pounds of pressurized warm seawater pummeled his backsides, with the commandant of the hoses in complete charge of where the jets hit. ``It revs up your circulation, soothes arthritis and helps to eliminate cellulite,'' she later told a man who will never meet cellulite as long as he lives.

Tim was not sure the results were worth the treatment, and probably, when we return to Le Sport, will not ask for the jet shower again.

Return we will, someday. Despite our very best efforts to experience all the activities offerred at this spa, as well as all the different health treatments available, we still have lots to do. We never got to a fencing class, took the calypso dancing lessons, or went on a bike trip to Pidgeon Island.

Current prices are from $225 per person per night to $250 per person per night, depending on the type of room and its location, and there is a single supplement of $75 per night.

7 a.m. power walk

7:15 a.m. morning hike

9 a.m. stretch classes

9:10 a.m. beginning tennis

9:15 a.m. bike tour to Pigeon Island

9:30 a.m. golf orientation

9:30 a.m. beginners dive

9:30 a.m. certified dive

10 a.m. windsurfing

10:15 a.m. beginners golf

10:30 a.m. water skiing lessons

10:45 a.m. beginners step class

11 a.m. intermediate golf

11:15 a.m. abs/thighs & butts

11:45 a.m. beginners archery

Noon water volleyball

12:15 p.m. beginners archery

12:30 p.m. reflexology, two by two

12:30 p.m. advanced beginners golf lessons

12:45 p.m. intermediate step lessons

12:45 p.m. darts competition

1 p.m. skiing lessons

1:30 p.m. sailing lessons

1:30 p.m. video session (golf)

1:45 p.m. resort dive

1:45 p.m. intermediate fencing

2:00 p.m. water exercise

2:30 p.m. archery tournament

2:35 p.m. fencing lessons

3 p.m. tennis tournament

3:30 p.m. weight training

4 p.m. beach volleyball

4:30 p.m. calypso dance class

5 p.m. body sculpt aerobics

5:15 p.m. tai chi at the temple

5:30 p.m. sunset walk

6 p.m. stress management

10 p.m. staff show